Row Solo

Not much in the way of hobbies, guess you could say that that is a bit of a problem. Like, just what the hell am I supposed to do with my life? People have many things to keep them occupied, I on the other hand don't really have that much. I mean I like listening to music but couldn't listen to it all day long, I like meditating and reading books on Buddhism but again I can't quite fill out my whole day with those things. I read other stuff but even that can only be done for so long. I write a bit but basically my writing is pretty crap as you can see. I write up my poems from time to time but even then the majority of people who would if they could see them and who have any kind of knowledge about poetry are not likely to even say that they are poems in the real sense of the word in regard as to what poetry is supposed to be. Other than those things just written above I really don't know what else there is that I find to do to occupy my time when that is I have any time. I am not much good at any kind of DIY so the house we live in is getting gradually run down as i don't have any of the skills needed to maintain things to any real degree. Mechanical problems and stuff like that just do not interest me in any way whatsoever and if they did it would not make much difference as I don't really have the brains to figure such problems out. When Tamdin is away then I will often go for long walks in London which i enjoy but i don't really undertake them because I am an expert on the city or anything like that, I mainly go on them as they are a good way of getting exercise without having to break out into too much of a sweat. I go on walks and I enjoy them at the time and I usually get back to Woodford feeling pretty tired. I never meet anyone in town and go for walks with them - it is always on my own. I guess I just let the sights of the city, the old city and down by the river, just let those sights soak into me, try to absorb the atmosphere of old London, shadow London, dark London, ghost London which is often how I feel the city to be. Not in a bad way but in a good way, a power packed way in terms of ghosts and history because the fact of the matter is that London has been around for a hell of a long time, easily 2000 yrs and countin' so I guess I could call it something like a ghost eternal. So, for me, there we go,a man in his late 40s going off for long walks through the back streets the quiet streets of London time after time... whenever time and space in his life allows him to. And there I am, always carrying round a head full of thoughts as I make my way to some hazily thought of destination that will be far enough for me to get to in order ot feel that I have walked enough. Funny old life I suppose when I think about it. Most people are much more comfortable if they are in company and if they have spare time it is usually arranged so they are in the company of others. Of course I am married and most of my time is spent with Tamdin my wife and that time together is perfectly fine as I enjoy her company very much, we get along pretty well, she makes me laugh as she has a great sense of humour but more importantly than that she has a great spirit about her and when she is not around and I am in the house on my own here in Woodford I can get to feeling quite miserable with myself as since the years have gone on I find that I am not so keen on just my own company when I am I at home on my own. The thoughts in my head can be more negative than postitive and when Tamdin is around she lightens those thoughts without a doubt. Nevertheless when I go out on walks through the city it is perfectly fine for me to do them on my own, headin' as I do into the big ghost eternal.