Behind It All

Life is constant movement. It can be problematic if you demand reality to stay the same. In Buddhism this is related to experiencing the suffering of change. In my own case I know that I have wasted a lot of energy and undergone experiences of mental agitation when I have either wanted things to stay as they are or not wanted things to come along which have. It is impossible to control every situation. Now, as far as I am able, I try to keep in mind that whatever the situation is, pleasant or unpleasant, it is just a temporary island I am standing upon.

Given enough time the landscape is sure to change. Not that thinking like this is enough to always prevent what I would call long term frustrations and sources of anxiety to appear in my mind and thus colour the thoughts I might be having. They are still too big for me to see them properly for what they are, and I can be liable therefore to fall under their influence, which is more emotional I guess than anything else. The result at those times can be negative feelings about my life, whether it be a sense of lack as far as achievement at work is concerned, or just all round disappointment over where I am as a human being.

The more life goes on the more I can see the value of prayer in those situations. Praying to the objects that represent higher power and wisdom is not necessarily a bad thing as long as you do not go too overboard with expectations of reward from anything outside yourself. Prayer is really about just making contact with those aspects of yourself untouched by the temporary swirl of conflicting emotions that more often than not result in painful experiences. There is a part of all of us that has always been untouched by the day to day consequences of living a life on Earth, a part of us which has not changed in any way at all since the very first day we were alive. To connect with that changeless nature is very important and if we can do it we will have done well. For me the door to it is opened by meditation. Not all the time, I would never say that, in fact not even a fraction of some of the time, but nevertheless it is a source of great hope for me and I don't think I will ever tire of looking for it when my energy allows me to.